


What to live for?

by werebreakingfree



Series: Live or Die Lance? [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Depression, Hurt/Comfort, Lance finding purpose to live, Lotor being a space grandpa, Training session with Generals, getting better, runaway lance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2019-10-30 17:46:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17833211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/werebreakingfree/pseuds/werebreakingfree
Summary: Lotor found a dying human in an Altean pod in the middle of an asteroid belt.Lance found himself in the clutch of Galra.What's left for the Ex-Blue Paladin?Note: Please read the first part of the series to enjoy this story. :)





	1. Who are you?

**Author's Note:**

> As promised, here is Lotor.

Lotor just left the main fleet of his father leaving Haggar on her own. As a temporary emperor he knew he wasn't really in power. It was all to give the empire the comfort that there’s an heir to receive the throne and that was if Lotor remained alive to claim it. Zarkon was alive and Haggar will never let him be the next emperor.

 

It didn't faze him even just a little, for he has his own plan and if the witch wanted to play he would gladly humor her. She just needed a puppet for the empire. Lotor entered the control room and sat on his seat as his generals greeted him. They were on their way to their base not known by the empire.

 

"Sir, we're already set to the coordinates, we'll arrive just in a few vargas." Acxa reported from her seat. Lotor just look at the feeds in front of him before he spoke. "Scan the perimeter; we wouldn't want anyone spotting our ship."

"On it." Ezor said as she watched the scanning complete. "So far, no ships or anything is- wait!" A blinking red dot was caught by their scanners at the nearby asteroid belt. It perked Lotor's attention. "We got something, it appears to be a pod and it’s not moving."

 

The Galra prince stared at the red dot on the screen; he was curious why it was docked in the middle of the belt. He felt a pull from it, like instinct he knew there's something in there. "I want a full scan of that ship, I feel there's some information we can get in there."

 

They sent a drone to inspect the pod and Lotor recognize that it was an Altean pod, through the scan they also detected a life form in the pod but it was really faint. Lotor didn't waste time and send Acxa to retrieve whoever was in the pod as Ezor prepared the medical bay. They successfully save the person in   the Altean ship and now Lotor was looking at the still form of the human floating in the healing pod.

 

According to the data on the medical scan he had severe blood loss from two deep lacerations on both wrists. If they hadn't found him in time he would be dead. Lotor decided to stay in the system and retrieve the escape pod from the asteroid belt before getting back on their track. The unexpected rescue mission put so many questions in the prince mind. The fact that the boy they saved was human and in an Altean pod was a clear give away that he was somewhat related to Voltron. But the question was why he was alone in the pod bleeding to death? Did the Paladins do it? Was he a traitor? Lotor was curious at the tan skinned boy with brown locks in the pod.

 

"Who are you?" He asked with a low voice as he placed a hand on the glass. Of course he didn't answer but the blue eyes of the prince stared intently at the boy. He'll be patient, it will take time from his wounds to heal and the boy had to reproduce his own blood to recover. For now he'll rely on the limited information they could get in the Altean Pod.

 

The extraction of the pod had been a work for the generals, placing an escape pod in the middle of those rocks was a difficult task, it requires high skill level on piloting. That's why it took them long before they secured the Altean pod in the hanger. Soon they were back on their set destination.

 

Lotor retired to his chambers after the long quintent. He changed into his sleeping wear and sat onto his bed with a tablet in his hand. He pulled the data gathered from the pod sent by Ezor. He read the information for a moment after a while he noticed something. The energy readings in the ship had the same signature as the Castle of Lions. That confirmed that the boy was part of Voltron. The pod was well packed with basic needs as if preparing for a long travel. The pod’s communication and tracking systems where tampered and as well as the camera recordings. There was no sign of struggle, inside the cock pit they only found a dagger on the floor.  

 

No matter how Lotor look, all he could assume was that the boy was a run away. As to who attacked him or why he left, it was still a mystery. If they could only get video logs, he might find something. If he wanted answers he had to get it from the boy himself, with that thought in mind Lotor set the tab on the side table and went to sleep.

 

When Lotor arrived at his base in the Zeniclyned system he was drawn on his work. Raising an army from scratch needs a lot of time and effort. In this base lies the main factory of his sentries and ships only for his trusted allies. Lotor didn't want to be a puppet of the witch or the empire. If he wanted to defeat his father he had to strive harder, be as powerful as Volton or even more and he will do anything to do it.

Several quintent passed and Lotor was quite satisfied at the result of their tests in the ships. The information that the stray human got out of the healing pod barely passed in Lotor's mind due to his work. He just ordered to secure him in a cell, until now he never had a chance to visit him. But when Acxa showed up on his laboratory with an ashen face, Lotor knew that their meeting couldn't wait any longer.

 

"Sir, the human." Acxa stopped, confusion crossing her face. "Acxa, tell me what happened." Lotor said calmly gesturing the general to come closer to his table that she followed. "He'd been recovering since he came out of the healing pod and cooperating very well. He hasn't done any attempt of escaping his cell nor making any problem with the guards, until today." The general paused and Lotor had a time to furrowed his brows. "Ezor and I checked on him and gave his rations, we’re trying to make him talk when he suddenly stole my gun."

 

"So he tried to escape." Lotor concluded, thinking that it was expected. "No Sir, He tried to kill himself." Acxa disclosed with a bothered look on her face. "If Ezor wasn't quick enough, he could have succeeded."

 

Lotor couldn't say a word, he knew some prisoners tend to fight or kill themselves due to too much torture or when they're broken enough. But they hadn't hurt the boy nor touch him. It was surprising for him to jump at the first opportunity only to kill himself. Lotor really need to talk to that human.

 

The Galran prince end the awkward silence by telling Acxa to watch the human carefully and he'll make time to meet the boy. An unsettling weight stayed in his gut through the whole quintent. That night he finally decided to face his human prisoner.

 

He found him sitting at the corner of his bed to the wall, his wrist was cuffed together. Lotor ordered the sentries to wait outside of the cell. The human wasn't looking at him, he was staring at the sheets. Lotor cleared his throat and spoke. "We found you alone in the middle of the asteroid belt, pod not powered, where you were bleeding to death. We saved your life and you can't even spare a glance at your savior?" He challenged the boy. The tan skinned human's brow twitched his eyes seemed to lit fire before he stare straight to Lotor's eyes. "Why didn't you just let me die? I'm no one."

 

The human's voice was trying to be arrogant but the crack at the end showed that he was really scared. Lotor also realized how young the human was, he was wearing a prison suit that was very different to the Empire's version. Lotor didn't like the how the empire treated their prisoners like slaves. The boy was wearing a dirty white jumpsuit mixed with Altean design. "We're not ignorant as you may think, it was easy to link you to Voltron given the pod you were boarding." Lotor said walking closer to the prisoner. "Galra already have data about humans, and finding one in a far-off galaxy is something bizarre unless you have an advance alien technology to get you this far." The boy seemed to flinched at that.

 

"Now tell me boy, what is your relation with Voltron?" Lotor asked he stood high before the little human. The boy didn't answer. Lotor saw something in his eyes, fear "You could just tell me or I'll force it out of you." Lotor threatened. The small sharp intake of breath didn't pass in the prince's eyes. The brown head human shifted on his seat. "I'm not- Do you really think I'll say everything to you because you ask. Do whatever you want, you're not going to get anything from me." Blue determined eyes stared back at him and Lotor knew the boy would be hard to break.

 

"I was just giving you an option, because whether you cooperate or not I will get what I want. I could always get Druids to extract information from you and even call Voltron themselves, from them I could easily get small information. It's just a matter of time, I'm not in a hurry of crushing my enemies." The prince declared looking down at the human who seemed to realize something as his eyes gone wider and he stood.

 

"Who the hell are you?!" The human yelled finally giving his full attention to him; Lotor smirked. "I won't tell you until you give your name." The boy snorted and flop back to the bed. "You are really getting in my nerves. I don't care anymore just torture me or kill me whatever."

 

"We'll see how long you could shut your mouth, I'm being careful right now because I don't know your identity yet but once I get a hold of that, I'll give you the proper treatment." Lotor said lastly before he left the cell.

 

The Galran prince gathered all of the data the empire had accumulate about Voltron for him to review. When Lotor was still an exile the appearance of the rumored legendary defender didn't interest him much. He believed that it was only him who could take down his father, but later on news from different part of the universe spread about the force that's trying to fight the Galra empire. Lotor didn't try to intervene with the two sides of war, instead he stayed hidden and gather his own army, securing alliance with every planet he controlled all to be ready when his time would come.

 

But the sudden fall of his father forced him to be part of the Galra empire again. And now he had to deal with Voltron. He settled on his quarters where he had a room where he could do some of his research. He read the files on his data pod. So far there were camera feeds that caught the appearance of the Paladins of Voltron. The Black Paladin was the well-known Champion from the Arena. On the screen showed a man with a scar on the bridge of his nose, his right arm was made of Galra technology. The Red Paladin was smaller but according to the reports he was good fighter and use sword. The Green Paladin was the smartest, it was reported that the Green Paladin was behind the breech on their systems and had high skill on hacking programs. The Yellow Paladin has a broad built, strength was what the empire saw in him.

 

So far, Lotor found the human as an inadept race. They're weak in physical aspects compared to other alien race and their technology was at the primitive stage, but to be chosen as the Paladins of Voltron Lotor knew there was something special about them. The five Paladin was enough to shake the empire and defeat his father. If the situation would allow an alliance with them can be possible. Lotor swiped the screen to see the Blue Paladin.

 

 When the blue armored paladin showed in the screen all Lotor could focus was the face behind the visor. _'It was him.'_ He realized. The Paladin was crouched on the edge of metal post, a blaster was on his hand taking shots from below. The body structure and the brown curls peeking at the visor was exactly similar to his prisoner. "It was him." Lotor said out loud, his eyes went to the information written below. The Blue Paladin was known to be the sniper of the team. In every encounter with the team Voltron the empire's sentries were mostly eliminated by the sniper well hidden from a distance.

 

Lotor's eyes went back to the face of the Blue Paladin on the screen. He had one of the Paladin of Voltron in his ship. He had one of the factors that he could turn into a useful card in the future, but how was he going to do it. Securing an alliance with Voltron was the greatest advantage he could get before the empire tries to dispose him. It was a delicate proposition, he had to show the Paladin and Voltron itself that he was not like his father and their aiming for the same goal.

 

It would be a lot of work but Lotor was willing to take the chance and if the Paladins and Princess of Altea rejects his offer of alliance then they'll be one of the things he need to destroy. Lotor sighed and dropped the data pod on his table, he planned his next step before he resigned to bed.

 

The paladin was staring confused at him when he entered his cell. "I know who you are." Lotor said as he strode toward the human standing in the middle of the room. The boy tensed for a moment and stepped back ward. Lotor caught his cuffed wrist. "Let me go!" The boy tried to struggle. "Calm down I'm not going to hurt you." Lotor proceeded and removed the cuff. "What are you doing?" The boy snatched his hand and glare at him.

"I wasn't aware that you're a Paladin of Voltron until today. If I have known I wouldn't treat you like that. Seeing how we found you I assumed that you're Voltron's enemy. I had to keep on guard until I prove that you're not a threat to me or Voltron." Lotor disclosed.

 

"I, I don't get it, you're Galra and shouldn't you be Voltron's enemy trying to steal the lions and stuff?" The human argued in disbelief. "I know it's hard to believe but I'm not part of the empire, well except now." Lotor sighed waved at the Paladin to come. "We have a lot to discuss we'd rather be in a comfortable place than here." The boy just frowned at him.

 

"This is Ezor she'll give you your clothes and escort you to my quarters." Lotor introduced his general, he let Ezor talked to the boy and soon they were out of the room. Lotor put Ezor to the work because she was capable of reading people, and hopefully the human would feel comfortable with them. The prince exited the cell preparing for his meeting with the Blue Paladin. If he played his cards right he'll gain the Paladin's trust.


	2. In the eyes of the broken one

When Lance woke up in someone's arms dazed and weak he thought he was back in the castle of Lions. His mind was fogged with uncoordinated memories. Had he been shot? Had a mission went wrong and he end up in a pod? He pushed the arms so he could stand on his own but another pair of arm took his wrist and secure them with cuffs. Lance blinked twice. "What the?"

 

"This is just a precautionary measure we had to do. Since we still don't know who you are." An alien with pink skin and green eyes told him. "We could club you to the head instead if you want but that would contradict the point of why we put you in the healing pod. Just follow orders and you won't get hurt." A large female Galra said next, before he was pushed to walk.

 

Lance was in a Galra ship, it took him a few tics before he remember what happened. He stole a glance at his wrists and arms in front of him. Dread pooled in his gut, he was saved or captured. His plan failed and for worst it brought him to the Galra. He was too drawn to his failure to notice that they had arrive a prisoner’s cell, without another word they locked him in.

 

It was a small room with a bed on the farther wall where a dirty white suit was folded, he was just wearing a gray pod suit similar with the one in the castle. Lance didn't really care. Tears fall from his blue eyes as he sunk on the cold floor. He messed up royally. He was so stupid! Stupid! Stupid! He clutched his knees, his claws sinking hard to his flesh. He did all the effort to save his team from his useless self and now the Galra caught him! He couldn't even kill himself properly.

 

That night, he thought that everything would finally end, but because he was a coward he failed to do the one final job. He could have cut himself in ribbons, maybe then he'd die faster. The thought just made him whine weakly, how pathetic he could get? But he was here now, alive and in the hands of the enemy.

 

His mind raced in a million miles. How could he fix this mess, if the Galra knew who he was they'd use him against Voltron. He didn't care what they'll do to him he only cared about his team. Now he was bound and locked in prison, how could he help his team? Surely, he needs to escape first and hope that whoever caught him won't contact Voltron. Lance had to live a little more for his team. The Cuban boy wiped his tears, he had to be strong, he brought this to himself that's why he had to at least try to fix it.

 

Lance calmed himself enough and start to think of a plan. The night cycle came and food was brought to his cell. At first didn't ate the bar looking thing lying on a tray with some kind of pinkish drink bit after the third ration he was too hungry to be stubborn. He was expecting to be interrogated or tortured but days passed and no one really came to get information from him. He assumed they were not aware that he was a Paladin of Voltron, because it's the only thing that could make them torture him unless they were planning something different.

 

The silence in the cell not only gave Lance time to think, it also let his dark thoughts settle back in his mind. He wondered if the team would try to find him, they surely knew by now that Lance left.  Though he highly doubts it, all Lance could imagine was the disapproving look of Allura, Keith's rage on him and Shiro's disappointed look when they found out that he was captured by the Galra.

 

If he just succeeded on killing himself he'd be not stuck in this situation. All he could bring to the team was problem, for just existing for a few quintent he managed to get himself in such a predicament. He chuckled at the thought, he was really useless. He was drowning in negative thoughts when two Galra women entered his cell and brought food.

 

The pink one would always start to talk to him, but Lance never replied, he only listen hoping to get some knowledge about them instead. But when his eyes spot the gun on the side of the blue haired Galra something stirred in him. He thought of the potential of stealing it, thinking it through though he realized that having the weapon wasn't enough, he'll only get a few shots before they could restrain him. A few shots.

 

Something dark swelled in his mind. "One shot is enough." He whispered to himself. It perked the two Galra's attention and move closer to him. "Did you just say something?" The pink alien said moving closer. The blue haired one was fast to Lance other side, Lance didn't know why but it wasn't important. He just need one shot.

 

Lance quickly rammed his head to the chin of the blue Galra. They both fell on the ground, Lance took the opportunity to pull the gun from the holster with his cuffed hand before he rolled away from them. His hand was comfortably fit in the handle finger resting at the trigger.

 

Lance heard the two shouting something at each other while the blue haired Galra pulled a knife from her back; she was on her fighting stance. But Lance already won because he had the gun.

 

As fast as he could. Lance pointed the gun on his chin, closed his eyes and pulled the trigger. The shot rang in the cell but the only pain he felt was on his wrist, something hit him sending the gun out of his grasp. Lance was shocked as he stares at the blaster resting on the other side of the room. "Dammit!" He cursed and crawled towards it. Something hit him on his side sending him on his back on the cold floor. A weight settled on his throat and he couldn't move.

 

The pink Galra materialize above him and he realized that it was her that stopped him. Lance wanted to scream at her feeling bitter at his failure; he should have won, he's supposed to die. "What do you think you're doing?!" The Galra asked him with disgust on her tone. Her face was painted with hate and confusion. Lance couldn't hold her gaze he looked away, shame filling his chest.

 

They become more careful after his attempt and Lance stayed as miserable as he always was. He almost didn't notice when a new visitor came in his cell. If it weren't for him intentionally taking his attention. A tall Galra with a long hair stood at the center of the room, based on the way he presents himself Lance could say that he was the person in command in who knew where this place was. He had a white hair that rivaled Allura's. This was what Lance was waiting for.

 

The Galra explained how he found him stranded in the asteroid belt and saved him. To Lance it was pointless they could have let him die, it irate him so much that the words came out of his mouth. "Why didn't you just let me die? I'm no one." Lance hoped that he didn't sound scared.

 

He watched the Galra's reaction but all he could see was how intently he was observing him.

 

"We're not ignorant as you may think, it was easy to link you to Voltron given the pod you were boarding." The Galra said with air in his voice as he stride closer to where Lance was sitting. "The Galra already have data about humans, and finding one in a far off galaxy is something bizarre unless you have an advance alien technology to get you this far." Lance felt that he was caught. Of course they'd have a way to identify him, it was easy for them to learn who he really was and he couldn't let them know.

 

"Now tell me boy, what is your relation with Voltron?" The question rang in Lance's mind a little too loud. He was the Blue Paladin before he tried to left his team. Now he didn't really know if he still deserved to be called paladin. Lance might have been quiet for too long that the Galra started to threaten him. "You could just tell me or I'll force it out of you." Something snapped inside Lance, he knew he was weak and didn't really care if he dies in this place but if they try to use him to hurt his friends he'll fight till the end. "I'm not- Do you really think I'll say everything to you because you ask. Do whatever you want, you're not going to get anything from me." Finally the Blue Paladin glared back at the tall Galra.

 

"I am just giving you an option, because whether you cooperate or not I will get what I want. I could always get Druids to extract information from you and even call Voltron themselves, from them I could easily get small information. It's just a matter of time, I'm not in a hurry of crushing my enemies." The way the words fell from the other's lips sent chills in his spine. Lance realized that the person in front of him wasn't only a commander. To have such power to use Druid was a big proof. Lance had learned from the many information they took from Galra bases that the Druids were all under Haggar's command. So if this white haired Galra could easily deploy Druids it means he's had a high rank in the main command.

 

"Who the hell are you?!" Lance yelled, his brows furrowed as he stood, after the fall of Zarkon he hasn’t heard of any other threats within the empire. They thought Haggar was the next that they need to take down. Now Lance could see that the Galra before him might be one of the threat that the Voltron needs to watch out. The Galra just smirked at his reaction as if he was amused, not even affected. "I won't tell you until you give your name." The other said playfully instead. Lance wasn't pleased at his respond. It was like he was baiting him. He snorted and sat back on the bed. "You are really getting in my nerves, I don't care anymore just torture me, or kill me, whatever." He almost pouted.

 

"We'll see how long you could shut your mouth, I'm being careful right now because I don't know your identity but once I get a hold of that, I'll give you the proper treatment." The Galra said lastly before he left him alone in the cell. Lance was filled with dread at his threat, he was in the hands of a powerful Galra and soon he'll be used against his team. The Cuban boy could only hug himself as he sat in place. "I'm sorry." He whispered to himself. "I'm so useless."

 

The cycle passed and Lance lost tracked of the time, he didn't know if it's morning or not. All he knew was that he had slept for a few vargas and now he's back at staring at the wall. He had decided that he'll never let them use him to hurt his team, he'll fight as long as he could and if he's lucky he'll die.

 

Lance felt wrong thinking that way, a small part of his mind was telling him that he had to live. He could still feel it from time to time but he had fell so deep in his self-hate, without his teammates to prove it right or wrong. He had nothing to lean on and his situation as a prisoner only worsen it. He just wanted to escape from his life.

 

He wasn't prepared when the door slid open. The white haired Galra marched in like he owned the place and maybe he did. Two sentinels were on his sides. Lance quickly stood in alarm and tried to compose himself. Whatever they want to throw at him he'll stand his ground for the team.

 

"I know who you are." The Galra said walking straight towards him, Lance stepped backward ready to retaliate if needed, but the Galra didn't stop until he got hold of his cuffed wrist. "Let me go!" Lance yelled as he tried to pull away from the Galra. "Calm down I'm not going to hurt you." The Galra said almost in a comforting manner. Lance continued to struggle until he heard the sound of the cuff falling to the ground. It confused Lance, the white haired Galra removed his cuff and couldn't find a reason why. He stared back at the other man. "What are you doing?" He asked pulling away from him.

 

"I wasn't aware that you're a Paladin of Voltron until today. If I have known I wouldn't treat you like that. Seeing how we found you I assumed that you're Voltron's enemy. I had to keep on guard until I prove that you're not a threat to me or Voltron." His tone seemed to be apologetic. "I, I don't get it, you're Galra and shouldn't you be Voltron's enemy trying to steal the lions and stuff?" Lance couldn't stop his mouth from asking. "I know it's hard to believe but I'm not part of the empire, well except now." The Galra glanced to the side and sighed tiredly, he stared back at Lance and offered a hand. "We have a lot to discuss we'd rather be in a comfortable place than here." Lance just frowned at him.

 

"This is Ezor she'll give you your clothes and escort you to my quarters." The Galra said waving to the pink alien to come closer. The woman stepped forward and gave Lance a grin. "Hi I'm Ezor, sorry for kicking you last time but I just have to make sure you'll stay alive." She offered her hand and Lance hesitated to reach it. But a soon as he lifted his hand Ezor grabbed it. "By the way we have to change your clothes into something more appropriate." She started dragging him out of the room. "Wha.. Wait." He said in protest but Ezor was bigger than him, and he really couldn't fight her. "Relax I'm not gonna hurt you."

Lance's mind was still racing in a thousand miles. The sudden change on his captor’s way of treating him was very confusing it’s not what he was expecting.

"I appreciate that you're not torturing me after finding that I'm a Paladin but this is still unbelievable." The Blue Paladin said as Ezor guided him in the hall way of the Galran ship. "We're in the same situation here human, I'm not really sure why we are not doing that. But I believe our leader and he'll explain everything to you." Ezor said as they enter a room, she go straight to the rack and pulled out something. "We haven't washed your clothes so here's spare, it came from our allied planet. I think it will fit you just right." The clothes were dropped to Lance's arms. "You can take shower if you want. I'll be waiting outside." Ezor points the shower room before she left Lance staring at the shower.

 

Lance sighed in defeat; he didn't have enough energy to argue with himself anymore. He'll face his captor later but for now he resigned to taking shower and changing his clothes. After a good thirty minutes in the room Lance emerged wearing a blue dress shirt under a coat of darker shade of navy blue. The design wasn't familiar to him but the way it was made let Lance know that the alien it was made for a humanoid form. The pants had a lighter color, he found boots in the room to complete his get up.

 

"Hi, Ezor." Lance grinned at the waiting Galra, he couldn't help bit greet her now that he was feeling refreshed but he managed to stop himself from saying a pick-up line. "You look quite a sight." The other respond with a playful smile. Lance didn't expect that and he tried to stutter a thank you but Ezor's hand was back with his and the was back on being dragged in the hallway.

 

Soon they were standing in front of a door, it wasn't any different with the other doors they passed but Lance still feel nervous even he'd been telling himself to be strong and fierce as a Paladin of Voltron. A hand on his shoulder took his attention. "Don't worry you'll survive, he won't bite you unless provoked." Her words weren’t reassuring.

 

Lance gaped at her because Galra sure have sharp teeth and Lance had nothing to defend himself. Ezor made a face and giggled. "I'm just kidding just get inside and talk to him." Ezor pats his back and pushed him inside. The door opened as he stumbled inside, Lance barely caught himself but he was a little too late because he bumped at something hard and fell backwards.

 

The Blue Paladin cursed under his breath as he heard the door slid shut. He quickly glanced at the door before he looked at the thing he bumped onto. It was the white haired Galra, Lance scrambled to his feet. "Who are you? And what do you want from me?!" He tried to look intimidating.

 

"There's no need to yell Blue Paladin, I will explain everything if you would join me for breakfast." Lance hesitated before he walked towards the table at the left side of the large room. He only realized how huge the room when he finally sat on the chair. His eyes roamed to his surroundings. They were settled on a small sitting room across a metal desk that has tablets laid on them. There was enough space on their left next to a mattress, it looked like Allura's bed but simpler, there were carpets and displays that Lance wasn't familiar with. It sunk to him that he was in the Galra's room alone.

 

The Galra place a plate of alien food in front of him and it smells good. Lance's stomach suddenly grumbled. "Eat Paladin, I assure you it’s not poisoned." The white haired Galra said as he sat in front of him. "How can I trust you? I don't even know you." Lance countered stubbornly.

 

"Ah, where's my manners, it seems Ezor didn't tell you who I am."

 

Lance just raised his brow waiting.

 

"I'm Prince Lotor, son of Zarkon and Honerva of Altea. I'm the current emperor of the Galra empire. It’s a pleasure to meet you Paladin of Blue." Lotor introduced himself with the air of a real prince. Lance just gaped at him.

 

"Are you for real?!" Lance exclaimed in disbelief the Galra before him looked nothing like Zarkon. "You look nothing like him!" He said out loud.

 

"Indeed, and that's something I'd like to stay forever." Lotor said with a mischievous smile, and Lance broke into a fit of laughter. It had been a long time since he genuinely laugh of smile and it made him feel at ease. "Sorry, I just can't believe that you'd agree with me. My name is Lance." He couldn't stop the words coming out of his mouth.

 

"Lance, I would still like to apologize for the way we treated you." Lotor stated as he served the drinks. "Right, but you really didn't treat me bad, it's fine." He answered quickly. "So, what do you want to discuss with me?" Lance stated gaining the confidence at their exchange.

 

"As I told you, I am now the Empire's emperor, I was only recognized due to the fall of Zarkon despite being exiled for decaphebes. Unlike my father I never had the intention to continue his way of reigning the universe. All those time I was aiming to defeat him. When Voltron came into the war the Galra was shaken and now I'm considering to form an alliance with Voltron." The Prince explained. Lance listened carefully and understand the other's point, though he still couldn't let his guard down. He needs to know if Lotor could be trusted.

 

"Finding you in that pod was a true luck for me. I am hoping you could help me talk with the other Paladins and princess Allura about my offer of alliance." Lotor said in a serious tone. Lance waited a few ticks before he replied.

 

"Lotor, I'm still not sure if your intentions are true but regardless, you got the wrong guy to ask for help. I'm not a Paladin anymore." Lance said with a weak smile on his lips. The Galra Prince's brows furrowed in confusion. "I don't understand."

 

"I, I can't be a Paladin anymore." Lance stared down on his food. "I, they're better off without me." He said silently, Lance could feel the eyes of the Galra on him. "But they are good people, I know if you approach them, I mean the other Paladins they'd consider your offer as long as you prove that you can help to save the universe." Lance managed to meet the blue eyes of the Galra, but he quickly turned away. Lotor seemed to be in deep thought as he stares at him.

 

The Galra moved on his seat and carefully hold Lance wrist. He could have pulled his hand away but Lotor slowly exposed his skin bunching the sleeves on his arms. Lance stared at the long scar on his wrist going up to his elbow. He swallowed nervously, he never really paid attention to his scars, but as he looked at it now he could see how fatal it was. How close he was.

 

 Lotor's thumb ran on the white scar over his skin, and Lance blinked looking at the Prince. "These wounds, did they do this to you?" There was distaste in his voice. "No! No, they didn't. It was me." Lance was too late to cover his mouth, why couldn't he shut up. He tried to pull away but the Galra didn't let go.

 

"Why?" Now Lotor sounds angry. "You're a Paladin of Voltron! You should have known how your action would affect the war. It is irresponsible and unjustified to do this to yourself."

"They don't need me! I only get in the way, it was clear enough, I never contributed anything to the team. I'm doing this for them." Lance argued and finally swiping his arm from the prince.

 

Lotor shook his head and walked back to his seat he seemed to be bothered. "I didn't intend this conversation to go like this. But one thing is clear. You are not in the right mind to make a decision." Lotor faced him with a stern face. "I strongly disagree with your claims of being incapable of being a Paladin, Galra have recognized your talent in the battle ground. You are one of the greatest threats when it comes to our battle plans because of your snipping skills. You always have covered the backs of all Lions that the commanders were struggling to find a weak spot in your formation." Lotor continued as he sat back on his chair.

 

Lance was out of words after hearing what the Prince said. He couldn't believe that he would hear the validity he's been aching to hear coming from his supposed enemy. His team never see him like that he was nothing but a burden to them.

 

"I don't know who made you think that way but if it somehow was your teammates, then Voltron had no place as my allies." Lotor said grimly.

 

"You know now how messed up I am." Lance laughed to himself. "Now could you just let me go?" He said hopefully.

 

"Is that really what you wanted?" Lotor asked as if challenging him. Lance shut his mouth and think. Is that really what he wanted? Before he could come up with an answer Lotor cuts him off. "Let’s end this for now, the food is getting cold. Given your condition, you're still my guest Lance. When you make up your mind don't hesitate to reach for me." Lotor said lastly as he proceed on eating their breakfast. Lance only had to sip on his drink to acknowledge his hunger and he finally decided to eat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: This is the longest chapter so far. The point of view will change between Lotor and Lance. I hope you liked this chapter. Leave comments so I can know what you think about it. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! Until next chapter. :3


	3. A Day with the Ladies

Lance poke his head on an empty room only to see nothing but a bunch of craters and boxes. The lightings in the hall way had a different shade of purple compared around Lotor's quarters. He was definitely lost he figured. His breakfast with the Galra Prince surprisingly went well. Lance was still doubting the Prince's motive in his acts but, after their conversation Lance could say that he was close to believing the Galra.

 

Lotor even gave him permission to roam around the ship as long as he keeps a communicator with him which lead him being lost. Lance couldn't get the urge to demand his freedom when he didn't have a plan where to go. The Galra prince asked him to stay with them for the meantime until he had a solid plan in the future. So Lance used his time checking the whole place. He managed to find the hangars, the mess hall and the training room. Surprisingly Lance, encountered only a couple of Galra soldiers and none of them tried to attack him. They all just brush him of and continue with their work. Lance wondered if they know who he was, though he kinda know the answer.

 

The lights in this part of the place was darker and the Cuban boy was getting nervous. It gave him the vibes of danger, it seems like he was sneaking in a Galra base, but without weapon. The fact that no sentinels nor guards were rounding made him feel like he was walking into a trap.

 

Lance shook his head, he was thinking too much. Lotor told him that he wasn't a prisoner but a guest. They wouldn't do anything to him would they? He continued to walk and found a path going back to the lighter part of the ship. He still wasn't sure if he was in a ship or a castle or a planet. He forgot to ask Lotor.

 

"There you are!" Somebody shouted from the next turn of the hall. It was a huge female Galra, she was well built and had a fluffy ear like most of the other Galra. Lance stopped on his tract, eyes widening at the call of the woman. "Me?" He stupidly point at himself.

 

"Ezor asked me to get you kit." She said loudly towering the small human. "To the training deck." She turned expecting Lance to follow her. Lance willingly do so, he was lost anyway.

 

When they reached the training deck Ezor bounded towards him with excitement. "Hey Blue kitten, I've been searching for you! Good thing you're here now. We can finally kick Acxa's butt."

"What?" Lance could only say.

"I'm the one who's searching and found the kit." The large Galra said with a huff. "Yeah right. But we should start training I want to prove something to that girl over there." Ezor said pointing inside the training room. Lance didn't have time to glance that way as Ezor grabbed Lance's hand and was about to pull him inside when the Cuban boy retorted.

 

"Whoa, whoa, wait a sec. Why are you calling me kit? Who's kicking whose butt? And would do you stop pulling me around!" Lance raised his hand to calm Ezor, he was really confused on what's happening.

 

"Oh sorry, well we decided to call you kitten since we didn't know your name. This pretty thing here is Zedrith and the one inside is Acxa, we are Prince Lotor's generals." Ezor explained going to Lance side and hooking her arm around his shoulder, now pushing him to the training room instead of pulling. Lance make-face at that.

 

"And you are going to kick Acxa's butt." Ezor smirked as they entered the deck. Inside the girl named Acxa was running a shooting simulation, it was in range format where the target stayed at a distance but moves in random setting. Acxa was shooting every target with good aim. The set was only focusing on accuracy. When the sequence ended Acxa walked towards them.

 

"I'm Acxa, it's a pleasure to meet you properly Blue Paladin." Acxa extended a hand to Lance, her eyes were fixed on his. The boy being a gentle man accepted it. "Lance, just call me Lance." He said trying to hide the creeping blush on his cheeks. It was like meeting Allura all over again.

 

"So much for formalities." Zedrith said. "Let's just start this so I can finally wreck some metal heads."

 

"Okay, so Axca had been telling us that she could beat the renowned sharpshooter of Voltron. So when we found out you're the Blue Paladin, we would like to see it for ourselves." The pink Galra explained.

 

Lance was flattered and becoming more flustered. He may be known for bragging within the team Voltron but it was all just to cover his insecurities. To learn that Lotor's generals had been hearing news about him made him a little appreciated and embarrassed at the same time.

 

"That's a little bit farfetched." He said in an instant but they somehow took it the wrong way. "It's too early to make a conclusions Lance." Acxa said sharply her brows raised. "No! I didn't meant it like tha-" The Blue Paladin tried to tell them. "Lance has spoken, Acxa." Lance felt the hard slap on his back as Ezor further mess with the situation. "There's only one way to settle this." Zedrith let her fist collide with her palm from excitement.

 

That was how Lance found himself in the middle of the training room. Acxa went first on the training sequence, designed to go on obstacles while being targeted by drones. There was a time limit and the scores will be based on how far they'd get through the obstacle and how many drones they'll shoot.

 

They lend him an armor for his protection, it was purple and gray almost close to the sentinel's design. Lance held the blaster in his hand tightly, he had used that type of weapon one time on one of their missions, when he accidentally dropped his Bayard in the middle of confrontation.

 

Lance took a deep breath before he started the sequence. He dashed to find a cover as the drones started to shoot him. He had all the drones accounted in his mind, their positions and distance. He easily formed a plan eliminating each as he got his pace progressing to the next level.

 

It was different from what he does in the castle of lions. The drone fires at different settings, he almost got shot several times. When Lance managed to get to the third level he was panting, from all the running, ducking and firing. He felt like he was actually fighting for his life. 

 

Under the cover of a metal post he checked his time and saw that he still had three dobash to stay in the sequence. He had passed Acxas's level, but it didn't mean he's at advantage, because this was the part where he didn't know what's going to happened next.

 

He quickly peeked from his cover and spotted three drones standing by on his next stop. He readied himself and run in the open to see what the drones could do. They didn't fire but Lance saw a flicker on his left and quickly shoot where it came from. He hit a blade and change its trajectory. "What the hell!" He grunted as another flicked on his right. This time he just stepped back to avoid the flying blade. He run for cover to think his next action.

 

He observed that the drone were the ones who trigger's the launch of the blades, and that was when they detect him, so to stop the blades from coming he had to shoot those drones. Lance took his time darting from one position to another figuring out the pattern of the drones as he deflect the flying blades towards him not leaving any opportunity to learn from the enemy. Finally he had a plan and he needed to act fast.

 

Lance dive forward and roll on the ground, one of the drones set a command and a blade was sent flying towards him. Lance was able to predict its trajectory and deflected it with the laser of his blaster, he couldn’t stop the smirk form on his face he already knows how this will work. He didn't waste time and shoot the drones. The shot were meant to separate them and Lance quickly succeeded. He then hides on a nearby block before crossing the room towards the first drone, the blade was triggered but Lance was faster at dodging then it hit the second drone. Lance continued his strategy and finished the level before the time stops.

 

Acxa, Ezor and Zedrith burst towards him as he stood straight and tried to level his breathing, the sequence really pulled him hard. "Lance! You beat her!" Ezor yelled in excitement as she shook his shoulder. "As expected of a Paladin." Zedrith slapped his back a little too hard while Acxa glared at him with an expression close to pouting.

 

"Re-really? The training is so intense I thought I’m going to die in there." Lance couldn't help but smile. "See Acxa, I told you he's the real deal." Ezor said slinging her arm around Lance's shoulder. The Blue haired Galra sighed in defeat and offered a hand to Lance. "I lose in this one, but I hope you'll accept my challenge next time and if possible we could train together in the future." She said as Lance shook her hand. "Of course." Lance answered before he could think.

 

Lance and Acxa stayed on the side of the room and watched the other two female Galra train. They talked about how did Lance figured out how to defeat the drones which the Cuban boy eagerly explained. Slowly Lance was becoming comfortable with Lotor's generals. It was like meeting with other Aliens when the team go to Diplomat mission. Where Lance would just talk to different kind of beings and be who he is, where they would just accept what they see and not know how messed up he was.

 

The group dragged him to the mess hall for lunch. On the table Lance discovered that there were different variety of Galra food. Ezor talked about that they were free now because it was an off day for the team. Lance also learned that they were at one of Lotor's base. The conversation went about food to training and teasing, the setting was too familiar to Lance. It was like he was back in the castle, but it was when they're still fresh from Earth, when they still too scared to lose each other and cared for each other.  He felt a pang in his heart; he missed that. That was before they get consumed in the war where people change, when they're not yet too focus on saving other people's lives and value perfection and team work and now, they forgot him.

 

Lance tried his best not to breakdown in front of the ladies. He kept his facade on, joining the conversation. They all parted ways after lunch and Lance was left alone in front of his room. Ezor told him that it will be just temporary. Lance wasn't able to ask her more because she quickly left.

 

Lance inspects the room but everything seemed to be normal. It was larger than his room in the castle, it had a queen size bed at the center, a desk and metal closet. There was a tub something like a shower head in the bathroom. He tried to lock and unlock the door making sure that he won't be locked inside. His curiosity faded when the tiredness came back to his muscles.

 

He flopped on the bed on his stomach, feeling the soft sheets on his face. Lance rubbed them with palms, he liked its texture, he never felt this comfortable for a long time. He tried to recount how he became a guest in the Galra base, but his mind was too lazy to think, he slowly blinked his eyes and soon they were close out of exhaustion. Lance fell asleep with the last though in his mind _'Hey, I didn't try to harm myself today.'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As the title of the series said ‘Live or Die Lance?’ well this is the part where I’m having a hard time deciding if he will choose to live or not? Will he be still be succumb by his depression and insecurities?  
> But If feels good to write Lance in this part where he was appreciated and almost cared for by Lotor and his Generals. 
> 
> Tell me what you think? I’ll post the next part when I finished its three chapters.
> 
> Your kudos and comments are important for me. Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, Lotor is a good Galra.
> 
> And I'm bad at titles.


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